president
Saddam Hussein calls President Clinton and tells him…
Saddam Hussein calls President Clinton and tells him, “Bill, I had awonderful dream last night. I could see America, the whole beautifulcountry, and on each house I saw a banner.””What did it say on the banners?” Clinton asks.Saddam replies, “Allah is god, god is Allah.”Clinton says, “You know, Saddam, I am really happy you called. [...]
President Clinton and his wife are at the first baseball game…
President Clinton and his wife are at the first baseball game of the season. At the start of the game the pitcher comes up in the stands and whispers something in Clinton’s ear. All of a sudden Clinton looks at Hillary and yells, “Okay, Hillary, GET OUT!”. She looks surprised but leaves. The pitcher looks [...]
Next US President
A redneck calles up the White House and tells the receptionist:”I’d like to become the next President of the United States.”The receptionist: “What are you, an idiot?”Redneck: “Why, is it required?
Ken: So Mr. President…
Ken: So Mr. President did you ever buy Lewinsky any giftsPrez: I don’t rightly recall … actually I did once splash out on a dressfor her
THE STATE OF THE UNION ADDRESS….THAT PRESIDENT CLINTON SHOULD HAVE GIVEN
THE STATE OF THE UNION ADDRESS….THAT PRESIDENT CLINTON SHOULD HAVE GIVEN “Members of Congress…People of America….I banged her. I banged her like a cheap gong. Which is not news, folks, because if you think Monica Lewinsky was the only skin flute player in my orchestra, you haven’t been paying attention. The only babes in D.C. [...]
In light of the latest allegations against President Clinton…
In light of the latest allegations against President Clinton, Woodward and Bernstein of Watergate fame are in negotiations with publishers to write a new book about the scandal. Working title: “All the President’s Women.
President Clinton, returning from a campaign stop…
President Clinton, returning from a campaign stop in Arkansas, is climbing the steps to board Air Force One. Under each arm he is carrying a souvenir of his trip — a live razorback. At the top of the jetway, he is met by the guard, a Marine sergeant, who issues a crisp salute.”I’d salute you [...]
Jerry Falwell was seated next to President Clinton…
Jerry Falwell was seated next to President Clinton on a recent flight.After the plane was airborne, the flight attendant came around for drinkorders.The President asked for a whisky & soda, which was brought and placedbefore him. The attendant then asked the minister if he would also likedrink.The minister replied in disgust, “Ma’am, I’d rather be [...]
The first Jewish woman President is elected…
The first Jewish woman President is elected.She calls her Mother: “Mama, I’ve won the elections,you’ve got to come to the swearing-in ceremony.””I don’t know, what would I wear?””Don’t worry, I’ll send you a dressmaker””But I only eat kosher food””Mama, I am going to be the president, I can get you kosher food””But how will I [...]